Why did the lightbulb go out? It was on too long

What's blue and pillowy? A blue pillow

What time is it? 10:58

knock knock who's there a tiger Alex proceeds to walk away as there is a tiger at his front door. he then calls the police because of the potential danger. the animal control then apprehends the animal and takes it to an enclosure

There was this cat, and he was walking down this long road, knowing a dog lived on 45 lake avenue. So the cat was very careful while walking by that house so the dog and his diqqas wouldnt chase the cat, named pat. So like a rogue in the arathi basen lodge, he made his way over the stone wall and ran as quickly as he could through the muddy path of dirt. This cat was also swagged out of control, so he had mad bitches. That is where Pat was heading....... to his mad bitches. He had never met these bitches, but bought them offline on a p0rn website that said he would become the man if he purchased the mad hot bitches. When he found the bitches, he shit himself. The bitches were female dogz. if you read this whole paragraph, a fraction of your soul has been ripped out of you. UMAD? ˜´??

Why couldn't the blonde bride make it to her own wedding? She had another unplanned circumstance occur and the wedding was postponed until next week.

If a fish eats fish bait, and a dog eats dog bait, what does a master eat? Anything he feels like eating at the given moment provided it is in accordance to his diet and beliefs.

When someone throws a rock at you What do you say? A:Oww

whats black white and read all over a zebra bleeding to death because a zombie just attacked it and then it attackeed the zombie

What is big, grey and can't climb trees? A car park.

A blind man walks into a wall.

How many wooden chairs can a black man staple to a whales forehead? 27 because Helen Keller does not like blueberries.

Have you ever seen Hellen Keller's house? Well it was really nice.

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

Why are rich guys gay? They can afford to be

What kind of bread makes pickles? Dill Dough

Okay, I just really want you to trust me again,

1: Ask if I'm a truck. 2: Uh... Are you a truck. 1: No.

What was the last thing going through the man's mind who cleans the 90th floor windows on the World Trade Center on 9/11? The 91st floor.

Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive traits.

LIFE :(

This made my day: The Japanese verb "to drink" is "nomimasu". [L]

Q: What did the boy say to his mum when he saw a Lion A: Hey mum that's a Lion

What is an old ginger lady's favorite type of bread? Whole wheat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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