Why do Chinese people have flat faces? Air bags.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What is worst than a worm in your apple, the holocaust and everything else? Finding me in your bed (or your mother screaming "help please, no wait its too good I will endure the pain") Rather than Santa`s presents for X-mas. Your friendly Neighborhood and Future ONE AND ONLY EMPEROR R*pist Moral Man:: X-mas is a great way of putting it, after all it is your kind that X-ed Christ... ...As for your mother/sister/Infant/ screaming... Don`t worry, I will come for you too when I am done, it might take a while to violate someone to death though so be patient, because you might end up as a patient... Hahahaha! If you are really FUCKlNG LUCKY!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Gianni

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the chicken cross the road? There I no road.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock knock Who's there? Carrot Carrot who? Carrot in the tree house, cause it's orange.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Wanna know something funny? Your face

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did the farmer say when he lost his truck? Wheres my truck?

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Whats worse than purple nurples? Having the period

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the girl scream when she got her tooth pulled? Because it hurt her.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

so your skydiving in the ocean and one of you bedroom windows break. how many bloodstains does it take to paint a peice of bread covered in goat milk? the answer is D. 2731 books on cannabalism

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What happens when a jewish man, black man, asian and an amish man get on the same plane heading to Chicago? The reach their destinations safely and go their separate ways.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Shit Happens....or sometimes it doesn't! As the person is taken to the hospital with severe constipation.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Did you here that Hellen Keller got hit by a bus? No. Neither did she.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what's brown and sticky? a stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what do you call a Ukrainian who eats pirogi's A walking stereotype

thumb_up thumb_down +11

that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A black guy walks into a KKK meeting. He is burnt on a cross outside his families house. They will mourn his death for years to come

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is the difference between a deer and a child in africa? Why does it matter? They're both being hunted.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a man named Jimmy? Jimmy

thumb_up thumb_down +11

square circles have souls but gingers do not CC

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Want to hear the best joke? Your life :,( i think i hate you?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops