Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

I just farted, and now I have to Chit!

Where did the watch-dog take the blind man on Saturday afternoon? Wherever the blind man wanted to go

What is the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench is an inanimate object whereas a black man is a human being with rights.

Knock Knock Whos there? Jonny Jonny who? Jonny tsunami, hope you can swim Japan

I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! I won the battle but lost the war: I'm Donald Trump!

i like pie.

What is yellow and has thick, shiny fur? A banana. I lied about the fur.

When we was Antarctica and it was cold we would huddles arounds a candles. What did we do when it was colder? We lit the candle,

Q. What did the man say when his car broke down. A. Damn it, my car broke down.

Why did the girl lose her appetite She was stabbed repeatedly with a switch blade.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra!

Did you hear about the deer? He had antlers. If antlers where a kind of disease, that would be a pun.

Did you hear about the couple that met in a revolving door? They died.

Why do birds fly south in winter? Because its too far to go walking.

Why did the terrorist miss the flight he was supposed to blow up? He forgot his passport.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a convicted serial killer.

Chuck Norris walks into a bank. There is a long line to get to the teller. Chuck Norris waits patiently in line.

LOL May Wong

why did the boy drown? because water entered his lungs and suffocated him.

Whats green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A golf course

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted. You're adopt...wait what?

A young blonde walks into a bar and orders a shot of tequila. After about a few minutes she spots this very ugly man with one leg. The man just so happens to sit right next to her and orders a drink. The man reeks of cockroaches and he looks like a homeless man that hasn't bathed in months. They never talk and the blonde goes home.

why was the black man wearing a ski mask? he was skiing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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