Two guys walk into a bar. The third guy ducks.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I slipped you some roofies You'll be out in a few

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irish wristwatch JLR

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Who is worse than Justin Bieber? Hitler

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A viking walks into a bar, and orders 6 beers. the man working asks "why did you order so many beers?" the viking says"because one for me 6 brothers who were separated from me many years ago." then he leaves. the next morning the viking walks into the bar, and orders 5 beers.the man working says"im sorry for your loss." the viking says"what? oo no im just getting tierd of drinking!'

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What is translucent and smells like a carrot ? A translucent carrot.

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whats worse than being late to school haveing your family killed by an angry peice of toast

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What did the midget get for Christmas? A new watch and a gift card for Applebee's.

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Why do people poke people on facebook? Because they have no friends and will die alone

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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What is invisible and smells like carrots? The smell of Carrots. Pretty sure you can't see smells.

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im a dragon, no im not

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Roses are 3:18 Violets are 3:18 I Just figured out a pattern. And saved peoples lives with the help of Keifer Sutherland.

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Meh, I dont want it anymore! You can have it.

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"jrfevkhbgjk" said the retard.

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Knock knock Who's there? Boo Boo who? It's just a joke you don't have to cry about it

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a man walked into a store got what he wanted and left.

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What is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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Why didn't Charlie Sheen lose? Because he's always winning.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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How do you get a little kid out of a tree Throw a jar of foreskin at him

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's drivers license had been revoked for all of it's DWI's.

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why did the polar bear bury his face into snow? because he saw the 241543903 post and wanted to join in so he used a portal gun to teleport his head into some guy's freezer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops