Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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What's worse than finding a fly in your drink? Gonorrhea.

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what did the lonely boy get for christmas? the absence of a familly

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Why did Devon move out of his mom's house? His mom beats him.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

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How do u get a clown off of a swing? You hit him with an axe.

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What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

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How did the two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for half an hr? They didn't and they died.

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Racecar is spelled the same forwards and backwards. Masturbation does not work.

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your mom died.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

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What do you call a hot underaged girl. off limits i am her father.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your dog and finding a worm.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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Who can make 50 iPads in 1 hour? An Asian

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a blonde, a brunette and a red head are robbing a bank, they hear the police coming, so they try to find a place to hide. The red head hides in cat cage, the brunette hides in dog cage and the blonde hides in potatoe sack. When the police come the brunetter says "Woof, Woof!" the red head says "MEOW! MEOW!" and the blonde says "P-O-T-A-T-O-E!"

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The nurse at a hospital came out of the delivery room and chucked the baby down the hall to the father. The dad starts crying and the nurse starts laughing and said, "It's ok, it was already dead."

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why was 7 afraid of 8, cause 8,9,10

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at rhyming Refridgerator

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your landlord. Get the hell out.

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What did the man say to the other man? You smell nice today.

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Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

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What is the difference between Boyscouts and Jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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