What is the best way break up with your significant other without hurting their feelings? It is better to get it over with quickly and decisively. Gunshot to the head should do the trick.

Gary Busey walk into a bar. Everyone Ran out noticing the potential danger.

What did the African-American get for Christmas? Nothing. I did mention he was African-American, right?

why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

What happened to the boy who ditched his friends and lied to them...? His appendix exploded.

What are little Timmy's hopes and dreams? Destroyed.

Yo mama's so fat that when she steeped on the scale, it read a rather large number as compared to the average, healthy weight of the human race. Of course, she could become thin by working out or eating less, but she chooses not to because of the laziness that has now corrupted her completely.

Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

A man ordered tomato and basil, but received tomato with a man. the man's name is Basil!

Whats worse than sleeping on a bed of hot coals? Lupus

So a leg, an arm and a head win the Boston marathon. And I'm sitting here masturbating, ...

What do you call a black man that sells drugs? A pharmacist.

What do you call 99 lawyers in a car going off a cliff with no driver and another lawyer running in the other direction? A dick move.

How do you fit a homosexual man into a small card board box? You cut him into pieces.

An Englishmen, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar, and ordered a beer. They later went home and slept. They woke up the next morning with a slight hangover.

It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

Why did the man buy Trojan for his women? It's condom curtsey.

What's the difference between Rebecca black and your mom? Capitalize Black.

There's two bears in the shower. One bear says "pass the soap". The other bear says "no soap. Radio".

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?.

why did the plane crash? the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Roses are red Bacon is too Rhyming is hard bacon

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Dad: "Happy birthday, son! Let's go get a beer." Timmy: "But dad, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year has gone by and how little we've grown. No matter how desperate we are, we hope that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake, we know it's not to be, that for the rest of our sad, wretched pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably; happy birthday? No such thing.” Timmy's mom had just died of cancer a few days ago. A friend walks in the door, not knowing Timmy's mom died just a few short days before his birthday. He screams, "Happy birthday!" TImmy: "Damn. I'm not going through this again."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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