knock knock whos there not me

What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

Q: Why couldn't Katie ride a bike? A: Because she has leprosy.

There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick and could not speak at all during his final weeks.

What does a turtle do on its back? NOTHING!

What's tastier than a dead baby? An orphaned dead baby.

why didn't the drug addict take steroids? he was going to but died due to years of substance abuse

How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

Knock knock Who's there? The police. You are under arrest for sodomy.

What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being disabled.

My doctor recommended I take anger management classes. That really pisses me off.

What's the animal that eats with its tail? All of them, since they won't take it off when they get to eat.

national song of the mute person? 5 minutes of silence please

Surprise mother father (A+)

Yo mommas so fat they had to change 'one size fits all' to 'one size fits most'

What can be worst than letting someone you dont know run a chainsaw? Letting Smokey Dokey run a chainsaw!

What did the little orphan boy get for Christmas? Nothing because he had died six months prior to Christmas due to the horrible living conditions of the orphanage.

What's the difference between a monkey wrench and a snow cone? A lot.

What's green and fuzzy and would hurt a lot if it fell out of a tree and hit you? A pool table

Yo momma's so ugly, she decided to get plastic surgery and now has much higher self-esteem.

What do you call a chicken with it's head chopped off. A decapitated chicken.

How do you know that god was a male? You don't, that's why it's called faith.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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