What would you rather do or drag a board?

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Q: What happened to the dead baby? A: It was Buried

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How did Darth Vader make the little black boy's day? "I am your father"*heavy breath, heavy breath*

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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One day my dog ran away. We drove around for a long time looking for it.

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im the real danny hamilton you stupid asshole

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A little boy and a pedafile are walking through the forest at night. The little boy says "I'm scared." The pedafile says "You're scared? I have to walk home alone."

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Your maternal figure contains so many Triglycerides, her belt size is greater than or equal to the circumference of the Earth.

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" "It's who's." The grammar nazi has struck again.

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Two blondes get in a taxi. Who's driving? The taxi driver.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

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Michal j. fox has Parkinsons disease. He is tired of losing at jenga

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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Where do you go when your friends called you spoiled? Africa.

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A bear is chasing a rabbit through the woods. The rabbit stumbles into a genie while coming to a clearing. The Genie says, "I will give you both three wishes." The bear thinks quickly and says, "I wish every bear in the forest was female." The Genie then grants the wish. "And...now I wish that each bear in the country was female!" The Genie grants the wish. "AND I WISH THAT EVERY BEAR IN THE WORLD WAS FEMALE!!!" the bear exclaims, now getting overly excited by his wishes. The Genie grants the last wish and then turns to the rabbit. "Your turn." The rabbit wishes for a pair of running shoes and the well being of his family and friends. For his last wish he points at the bear and says, "I wish he was gay."

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knock. knock. whos there? BOWLING SHOE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why did the asian fall over? He had a heart attack.

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Where did Lil' Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They were baked until the baker them until they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the man with the knife say to the ostrich? Run or I'll stab you!

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What's purple and in my hand? Nothing i was lying about the purple

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Why couldn't the young pirate get in to the movie? Because he wasn't old enough.

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What do you call a fat indian boy Eeeeeeeh fatty boy

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Why did the orange fall asleep? Because its never awake.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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