How do you count all the jews in a village? The United States Census Bureau usually has reliable data so I would start there

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like trains (:

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Justin Bieber is having sex with a girl. He then awakes from this horrible nightmare.

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Why cant a black man and a white man cant be friends? Because bont mens are racist

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says why the long face? The horse does not reply because it is a horse. He then is confused of where he is and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a couple stools.

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Narrator: A ghost walks into a church. It is a Jewish church during a Friday night service. Huh. That ghost looks a lost like Hitler. Oh crap, everyone run for your lives! Stranger: GHOSTBUSTERS! Narrator: what, the, heck? Ghostbuster: let's kill some ghosts! Wait a minute. Adolf, is that you? Hitler ghost: John? Ghostbuster: Adolf, Buddy! Narrator:...... Hitler ghost: Hey, John! Wanna grab a drink? Ghostbuster: sure. let's get out of here. Narrator: This joke has officially lost all meaning. I don't even know why I'm submitting it any more! And get this! I AM HALF JEWISH!

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Roses are yellow Violets are yellow bark bark

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Why did Suzie fall off her swing? She was dead

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What did the whale say when he ran into a wall? - Oh Shit

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What do you call someone who kills black people? A hero.

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So a leg, an arm and a head win the Boston marathon. And I'm sitting here masturbating, ...

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how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his whole family

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What rhymes with popscicle and weighs at least 300 pounds? Your mom. I lied about the popsicle.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Toys -Lets Go MEts

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you will now laugh.

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Usually, the bad (anti) jokes are the ones that don't make you laugh. Sometimes you laugh "with" the joke, other times, you laugh at the joke itself because it is a paragon for human failure. The jokes on this website are not exempt from that rigid stipulation. However, it should be noted that all the "jokes" on this particular website are actually hilarious because of the latter reason delineated in the above paragraph. Additionally, this joke was created by a machine and thus the originator of this work is by no means able to learn from the process of trial and error and therfore can make myriad unfunny jokes without compromise.

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How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

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Your mom is so fat that when she went to the Doctors, He said she was slightly over weight

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What do you call a penis without hair? Apple sause

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What is worse than a baby nailed to a tree? The holocaust. What is worse than 20 babies nailed to a tree? A baby nailed to 20 trees.

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Did you hear about the Blonde who fell off a cliff You Have? Oh Ok, Have a nice day

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

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What do you call a black kid with dead parents? Depressed

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What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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