It burns when I pee sometimes.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

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A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. Since the man understands the meanings of most common phrases he responds in the correct and expected manner.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know I'm not a mind reader.

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What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the slaughter-house.

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do not read this(this is intended to be read)

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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Waseem is sad because all his jokes are not funny!

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: Art.

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What would you rather do or drag a board?

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Q: What happened to the dead baby? A: It was Buried

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What happens when you shoot a bear and you kill it? It dies.

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James: They say attitudes are contagious. Bill: How do you know? James: My whole family caught it and they will all die within 2 weeks.

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What do you get when you have sex with a $10 prostitute? Nothing, she's clean. She may be low-scale, but she'll be damned if she's not careful.

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what did the horse say to the bartender? why the short face?

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Why is Santa's sack so big? He has a malignant tumour on his testicle. We're all very worried about him.

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What do you call a middle-aged man at a preschool? A teacher.

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What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He died.

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What do u call it when a Jamaican gets angrey? Nothing, at all. Just an angrey person

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a horse walks into a bar. what does the bartender say? why is there a horse in my bar.

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What did Chuck Norris say when he saw a cop -Hi

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What's the difference between a murcielago and a dead baby ? I don't have a dead baby in my garage. 8-)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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