Why did everyone call the one-legged man Matt? Because that was his name.

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A black guy walks into a bar. He falls unconscious and an ambulance is quickly called to bring him to the hospital.

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Why don't women know how to drive a car? Because there are no roads between the kitchen and the bedroom.

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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what do mexicans like most. icecubes

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard -you throw them.

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What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

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Why did 0 dislike 1? Because 1 made 0 feel like he was nothing

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the WNBA

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Why do Asians squint their eyes? They were born like that.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, my eyes are bleeding

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GONNA

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Wanna hear a joke..... Corey Jacobs Scrotum!

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What did the skateboarder do when he was trying to do an ollie kickflip 360 and tailslide on a rail and dismount heelflip to manual? He fell

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What did the doctor say to the little boy? Pull down your pants and cough.

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What did one Chinese man say to the other? ?????

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A priest, a rapist, and a pedophile walk into a bar. That was just the first person.

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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"What is the sound of one hand clapping?" "I'm not quite sure, but your on fire."

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What did Batman get for Christmas. Nothing his parents are dead.

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Why did Jesus and his friends get crucified? So they could sing: "Always look at the bright side of life" Moral: Monty Python?

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A woman who owns a parrot leaves her home, forgetting that a plumber is scheduled to come fix her sink. A few minutes after she leaves, the plumber arrives and knocks on the door. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replies, "It's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink." The plumber waits for a minute and, seeing that nobody has come to the door, knocks again. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replies, a little more loudly, "It's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink!" The plumber waits for a minute and bangs hard on the door. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber screams, "IT'S...THE...PLUMBER!!! I'VE...COME...TO...FIX...THE...SIIIIIINK!!!" Just then, the plumber clutches his chest and falls dead to the ground. When the woman returns home, she sees the dead man in front of her door. She opens her door to go to her phone and asks the parrot, "who is it?" The parrot replies, "WHO IS IT?"

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What did the hobo find on the ground? A dirty nipple. ~Logan F.

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What's are the screams and terror when midnight hits? Vannlia Ice's face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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