I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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What do you call a cannibal who won't eat his own brother? A pussy.

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Why does jim never go to McDonalds? his wife got shot there.

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What do you call a black man that sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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knock knock whos there the game _______I LOST THE GAME_______

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

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What's Worse Than Unripened Fruit? Crippling Depression.

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It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot.

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Why did the pedophile get arrested? He was driving way over the speed limit.

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What is worse than having sex with a dead baby in front of it's mother? Not a lot.

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What is green and has weels? A green bycicle.

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Why was the black man hand cuffed by a woman cop? Because they are a married couple who feel like role play will help spark their sex life again.

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Q: What's fat and smelly? Q: What's worse than Nikki Manaj? Q: What's the bane of everyone and everything's existence? A: Kim Kardashian

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Herpes, Now you do too.

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Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It died. Q: Why did the snake fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird. Q:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Peer pressure.

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What's red and goes pop? A clip art of the word "Pop"

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Knock knock Who's there? An elf. An elf who? An elf who wants to be a dentist.

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What did the kid with no brain get for his birthday? Nothing because nobody thought that he would do anything with the toys because he couldn't think of what to do with them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.????????

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So, there's a lion loose in Colchester. Should've gone to Specsavers... [L]

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What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo.

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Whats worse than finding a bad anti-joke on this website? Dieing of Genital Warts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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