How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Two men are walking in a forest And they find this deep whole, so they spit in it to see how deep it but they here nothing So they throw a rock in and still hear nothing Them they find this old tramission and throw that in. A couple second later the goat comes running by and jumps in the whole A couple minutes pass and an old farmer walks up and asks if they had seen his goat and they replied" yea it just ran and jumped into that whole. The farmer says "that's weird considering I had him tied up to an old tramission

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Whats worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a dog eating a dead dog? A hungry dog

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Many people of many races do many things every day.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

one day i went to bed

thumb_up thumb_down -7

how many jews can you fit in a volkenswagen? 2 jews in the front 2 jews in the back 15 jews in the ashtray

thumb_up thumb_down -7

"knock knock" "ill get it honey" "no stay in the kitchen bitch!"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What happened when john pelted susie with a rock? she had a temporary concusion, needed eight stitches and John was grounded

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's red and smells like a rose? Bumble-bees licking honey off of a stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man laughs creepily and another man asks him what he's doing he says I have a creepy laugh so the man asks him why he was laughing the man says there's a boy over there that has a frog stapled to his face!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: Where did little Suzie go during the bombing? A:Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Dogs taste better in stews.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the blind orphan get for christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why are there no swimming pools in Mexico? The average yearly income is $3,523, and pool chemicals are very expensive.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I advise you, don't mess with me, I know karate, kung fu,judo, tae kwon do, jujitsu, and 28 other dangerous words.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why did the grandpa drop his big mak??? Because an army tank hit him

thumb_up thumb_down -9

how do you fit 20 babies into a bucket? you put them into a blender. how do you get them out? chips.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the woman fall off the skateboard? She hit a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I am not racist., I have a black man in my family tree! He is still hanging there

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk? A man wearing a fedora doing the moonwalk.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: What comes first the chicken or the egg? A: Pineapple.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops