What did the watermelon say to the apple? Nothing. Watermelons are fruits and incapable of speech.

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a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

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how many babies does it take to paint a house? that is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs. Why couldn't she see? The sun was in her eyes.

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What do you call a bunch of black guys on mars? a problem What do you call 1 million black guys on mars? a bigger problem What do you call all the black guys on mars? a solution

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How do you drown a blonde? Tie a cinderblock to her foot and throw her in water.

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knock knock who's there? It's Jim we haven't seen each other since college Why hello there come on in

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why did Sally fall off of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there?

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Is every Voltorb a terrorist?

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Whats the thing you least expect to find on Anti-Joke? A joke with a punchline.

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Question: What is black and white and read all over? Guess: A newspaper? Answer: No. A zebra that was shot by a poacher. Poaching is a serious problem all over the world and should be looked down upon by all. It is not something to joke about.

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A gay kid and a group of his friends are at the park. Gay: hey can you do a cartwheel? Girl: helllll no! Gay: Are you straight? Girl: Yah? Gay: Im gay and i can do one.

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A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

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So a Quadriplegic walks into a bar.....

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A

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What's red and has two legs? Half a cat!

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Knock Knock Who's there? I bought a Jeep

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A man walks into a bar. I forgot the rest of the story but the punchline goes something something something something your mom is wwhore.

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How do you kill two birds with one stone. You don't its not humanly possible because birds cannot be killed with rocks.

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hey guys what's up?

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What's black and white and red all over? A mime lying in a pool of blood.

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Why didn't the monkey fall out of the tree when someone threw a refrigerator at it? Because it was already lying on the floor dying of AIDS.

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Q: Why did Katie fall of the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Katie

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what does gum eat ? gum you idiot!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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