Q: What's worse than dropping your phone in water? A: Throwing water at your phone.

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Your Momma's so ugly, she went to the grocery store, and went she got out of her car, people said, "You're ugly."

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Why did Captain Hook die? He wiped.

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A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

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What's behind Chuck Norris' beard? His chin

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why did Mary fall off the swing? cuz she had no arms ------------------- knock,knock who's there? not Mary

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why did Sally fall of the swing....she had no arms. knock knock who's there? NOT Sally.....

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Antijoke the book. Seriously it sucks ass, do not bother, they only included the very worst ones.

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Why was the man sitting down? He was recently paralyzed in a car accident.

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God is almighty, as such he ANSWERS TO NO ONE! Moral: What you praying for then bitch?

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What did the diabetic boy with Celiac get for christmas? A gift from his loving parents.

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Q: What do you call a man driving a van with a bunch of stuff in the back that doesn't belong to him? A: A delivery man

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text this number 2066191208 saying i wanna rape you

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I have a black guy on my family tree. He's my cousin.

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If a little boy teleported to mars how fast would he get there? Little boys are incapable of breaking down their molecular structure in order to send their individual particles faster than the speed of light in any given direction. Thus this question is illogical and can not be answered.

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A dog walks into a bar. He asks for a drink in perfect english. People scream at the dog's ability to talk and scientists burt in and take the dog to dissect and study his brain, vocal chords, and dna.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I like to rape cats.

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Jake was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. His wife looks down and sees a scale.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? ghuieruioytidhfdvbshdkhfjh

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Q. Why did Michael Jackson call Boys II Men? A. He thought it was a home delivery service.

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What did the deaf person say to the comedian? ... ... ... ... I'm sorry, did you say something?

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As friend of mine recently told me that he knew my deepest darkest secret. When I asked him what it was, he said that I was too emotionally unstable, and that I would never be ready to settle down. I killed him.

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Why is this funny? cause it is funny

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Violets are blue, Roses are red. The sentence before was completely irrelevant, but I needed something to say before I tell you, Your family's been murdered by the KKK.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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