Q:What did the man say when he walked into a bar. A: Ouch

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Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato

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How do you flatten a worm? Feed it to a little boy, and then drop a refrigerator on him.

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What's worse then a bad hair day? Hattie.

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Two hillbillies are sitting in a van. It's friday and one of them suggests they should play a game of 20 Questions. The other one agrees. The first hillbilly thinks of the word 'donkey dick'. - Is it something you can eat? the second hillbilly asks. - Yes, the first one replies. - Is it a donkey dick? - Yes.

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What do you call a person on a swing? F u c k N i g g e r s

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What do you call a girl with 1 eye and 3 arms... Chernobyl.

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They say there is safety in numbers Tell that to six million jews

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Why did the bus fall down? It was hit by a bus and then repeatedly battered by a blender

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What's brown and sticky? Shit.

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two nuns were driving in Transylvania when a vampire jumps out in front of their car the first nun said "show it your cross" so the secong got out of the car and yelled Get out of the way you pric!!!!

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Lethal injection is a lot more humane than the electric chair. I know because nobody's complained about it yet.

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What is black, has either black or yellow stripes, and cannot climb trees? A parking lot.

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What do Texans call cows? Cows. Calling them almost anything else would be utterly illogical.

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What starts with 'P' and ends with 'orn'? Popcorn.

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what did the man with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a new hat

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Dad: "Happy birthday, son! Let's go get a beer." Timmy: "But dad, birthdays are merely symbolic of how another year has gone by and how little we've grown. No matter how desperate we are, we hope that someday a better self will emerge, with each flicker of the candles on the cake, we know it's not to be, that for the rest of our sad, wretched pathetic lives, this is who we are to the bitter end. Inevitably, irrevocably; happy birthday? No such thing.” Timmy's mom had just died of cancer a few days ago. A friend walks in the door, not knowing Timmy's mom died just a few short days before his birthday. He screams, "Happy birthday!" TImmy: "Damn. I'm not going through this again."

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Why did sally break her arm? A piano fell on her

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What did the Democrat say to the Republican? "I am sorry about your mother". They had been good friends since childhood and the Republicans mother was soon to die from terminal cancer.

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A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

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What did the dog say when the woman put a sweater on him? Nothing, dogs can't talk and he has no idea what is going on

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Why didn't the family go through the door? Because it was a window.

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Like if you like big tits.

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Why does snoop dogg carry around an umbrella?? ......fo drizzle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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