Magic is another word for "poorly perceived analysis of the mechanics of this complex instrumentality we call optical illusion."

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Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

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i am a dwarf i have a big nose im a ranga nice to meet you julia

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Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

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Why was the baby crying? It wasn't it got hit by a bus and died.

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How did the Jew escape being put in the gas chamber? He killed himself.

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So Doc... Do I have H.I.V or not? Well... Lets just say you should think positive now... NO! I CANNOT LIVE LIKE THIS *Jumps out window* ...Because the results might not appear correctl... OH you do not have... Where did you go? Phew, Good thing it was first floor! Dont be silly, you dont have an immune system which means you have full blown AIDS

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I'm insecure about my body.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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Q: What's Lindsay Lohan getting for Christmas? A: AIDS

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What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

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What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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whats worse that 3 black guys dieing in a train accident .... one was ur brother the other was gay

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Why did the boy eat his bagel? He was hungry.

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What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

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lol

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What's the difference between a black man and a pile of shit ? One is a black man, the other is a pile of shit.

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Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

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I'm so hungry I could eat food

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Grandma walked into the kitchen...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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