Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

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An elephant walks into a bar. He nearly levels the entire structure as he forced his way through the front door.

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Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

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Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

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why did the chicken not cross the road? He ran

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Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

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What's white and sticky? Glue.

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Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

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Women's rights.

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A black walks into a Kentucky Fried Chicken. He was a customer.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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Once upon a time, your face.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Why does Brianne cry? Because she has no family.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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who drinks pee? katness

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why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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JFK

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops