Why didn't the hungry woman get up and make herself some food? She has Lou Gehrig disease and any movement she makes results in excruciating pain.

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A blond was driving her car one day when "Party in the USA" came one the radio. She put her hands up; however, she realized she had to keep control of the car. She put one hand back on the steering wheel and arrived to her destination safely.

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I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

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Yeah Aodhans been typing up everything strting argument along with taggart

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what did the angry asian man do after chrashing his car? He died later in the hospital that night from a combination of severe head trauma, internal bleeding, and various fractures.

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William and Kate do get off their ass and do something useful for once instead of hogging the cover of intouch magazine.

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Mary Lu was swinging on a swing * swush swush* and her mom was sweeping the porch when she sad Mary Lu go get that big fat shiny quarter on that road then Mary Lu say how about you get your self that big fat shiny quarter.! Her mom drop the broom in discussed and walkout into the road and was bout to bend down when swush a bus runs her over And Mary Lu just laughed and laughed she knew that wasn't a big fat shiny quarter it was a nickel!!!!

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How do you fit 6000000 jews into a car? 1 in the front, 1 in the back and the rest in the ashtray.

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What do you call a pakie flying a plane The pilot... or a terrorist it up to you

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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What is Michael Bay's favorite fruit? Melon

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why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

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who drinks pee? katness

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Q: Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? A: He was looking for pooh

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what is it called when a woman is president. The Apacolypse.

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How was the fifty-four year old counselor in nineteen places at once? He was blasted by a cannonball.

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Why Did The Girl Cry? Old People Are Funny.

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Andrew: who's better at football, Peyton Manning or Tom Brady? Thomas: ur mom

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Roses are Red Violets are blue Goldfish

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A kid walked in to a bar, grabbed a napkin, and left

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what's worse than finding 8 babies in 1 trash can? nuclear warfare

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Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

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"Behold, the greatest invention Man has ever seen!" exclaimed the inventor of eyes.

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Why was the black man afraid of the chainsaw? Because its a potentially dangerous weapon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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