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My brother found snow in his hair from last year... only people who know me know this joke!!haha -sopie

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roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

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You can eat a pie. You can eat a chicken. But you cannot eat a human being because that would be called cannibalism and cannibalism is a felony that can give the government a right to hold you in an international detainment facility for up to 40 years.

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9/11

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whats red that looks like ketchup taste like ketchup and is't tomato sorce? ketchup

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finding nemo didnt make sense how could a shark go on a no fish diet

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what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

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Knock Knock Who's there? Frank Frank who? I killed your grandma

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how do you warm someone up? you set their house on fire.

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Fine, you got me there, I have already made sure that you get your compensation, it is the least thing I can do you let me know if anyone claiming to be part of my order bothers you again, I promise I will personally enforce strict guidelines in order to ensure that such a thing never happens again. I hope you will trust me, I will no longer call it the Order of Nero, but as you know we cannot reveal the true name of our order. I also agree to meet you in person so we can further discuss this impeding situation which I will give top priority. Truth is Nero, that I used to be one of your co workers in the underground, and my attempts at saving what is left might not be as ideal as the goals we are set to achieve are, we simply cannot expect that people excel at greatness at the first go. Of course this grave incident is not even near a "mere lack of greatness" but rather a group of people that yes, sadly have rightfully claimed to be members of our society, yet I need you to come to terms that this was a huge oversight in my vision for a new and "improved" underground society, and not a intentional attack at you and your personal security. I submit to your demands, and I ask that you partake in a small number of meetings where we can all discuss and further develop the necessary guidelines required to further solidify our foundation.

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WHO IS A CHIKEN???????????? I AM do you got a problem with that!!!!!!

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if a dinosaurs could talk, what would they say nothing their all dead

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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What's faster than a black guy with your TV? Probably someone who doesn't have to carry such a heavy object.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

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Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

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A joke were created last night and was so funny! But this is not the case

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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What was the dying boy's last wish? Not to die.

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A Mexican, and American, and a Chinese man are crossing the street. They all get hit by a car and die.

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Knock Knock There was no answer as the house was empty.

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Roses are red Violets are blue (not really) I have Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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Phillip has 200 pieces of candy, Phillip eats 185 pieces of that candy, what does Phillip have left? Diabetes, Phillip has diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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