Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. "Knock, Knock!" "Who's there?" "Not Sally"

Why did the Blonde say something stupid? Because she is stupid

Dear mom, I'm wearing skinny jeans. If I can't get them off, Neither can the rapist.

whats round red and taste like candy? such a thing doesn't exist

what is it called when a woman is president. The Apacolypse.

What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

69

knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

What's white on the top and black on the bottom? Society.

Gues what makes me smile Mouth muscles

What's black and blue and red all over Sex

How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

Why did Jim fall out of the tree? Because Jim is a leaf.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

"Behold, the greatest invention Man has ever seen!" exclaimed the inventor of eyes.

How do you confuse a blonde? Say eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

British Dentistry

What is it called when your friend tells you that Justin Beiber was laid? Lying.

Yidi Huang lives here.

Why did the color blind man cut the red wire and accidentally blew himself up and all the other people involved in the situation? Because he didn't know how to defuse a bomb.

Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Well, a test is a well thought-out series of questions, usually used in schools to determine a students final grade.

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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