A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

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What is more scary than an AK47,blood,and 99999 naughty children? Nothing problaly :p

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whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

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Jesus may have walked on water, but Stephen Hawking runs on batteries.

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What did the guy with Alzheimer's say to his.... Wait, I forgot the joke

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Am I the boss.No I was just offered the job

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whats a dexter whats a died? HaHaHaHaHa Im so so funny

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What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

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Why did Landry hit the man with a metal pipe? Because he was a rapist and wanted to remove his virgin status.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Then help me understand Nero, people had the free and legal right to decide to be a part of our, or your society if you prefer, where has that option gone now? Where is the people that choose to believe in their own potential and in the one of their equals? Today we live in a society where its basically pop culture to dislike oneself, where it is considered narcissism to like oneself, and you know that we have both been affected, while those we considered allies before, have joined the same people that branded us evil.

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What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra

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What do you call a man with no legs? Disabled.

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I dont no the difference between their and there

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? IT WAS DEAD.

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Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Good guess!

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Dear mom, I'm wearing skinny jeans. If I can't get them off, Neither can the rapist.

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A man walks into a school, he then proceeds to gun down the majority of the students before taking his own life. What a sad, sad day.

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What is the difference between a cow and a pig? To get to the other side.

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a ghost walks into a bar and sais BOO! The bartender then yelded AAAAHHH! and died of a hart attack.

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Three Jews walk into a bar... I lied, it was a gas chamber.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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