whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

And so the poster says to the apple ........ Your not my dog

Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

A batch of muffins is cooking in the oven, one muffin says to the others "it's hot in here!" the other muffins don't respond because they're muffins. He's the only of his kind.

How do you treat a homeless man? Like any other person, you disgusting fuck.

What does a homeless man eat for Thanksgiving? Half of a big mac he found in the dumpster

A man walks into the bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The man replies, "Oh, sorry." And proceeds to remove his horse mask.

Q: What's worse than death? A: Nothing.

How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

Q: what happens when you eat all the potatoes A: there all gone

Quess what the trash man did today? He took my trash.

Why didn't the blonde have friends? She couldn't find them at the store.

Backwards write to fun is it. As long as its forward. Emu

What's black, white and red all over? Multi- racial genocide.

How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 5 comfortably

How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

A man walks into a bar and utters profanity because he's hit his head on a protruding metal object that cannot move out of the way and has therefore made him look stupid because he neglected to walk around it.

Why did the young man visit the optometrist? Because when he went to put in his contacts earlier that morning, he dropped one on the carpet and couldn't find it and it was his last pair so he needed to go order new ones but it had been over a year since he had been to the optometrist so they make you come get your eyes checked before you make a new order to decide whether the lens strength should remain the same or be increased/decreased.

What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

whats bright and yellow? the sun.

What's red and on fire? My crotch

matt shut up

69

How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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