If a plane crashes on the border of America and Canada, where do you bury the survivors? Somewhere discreet where no one will find them

How often does a black women poop? Every nine months.

A blonde, a Brunette and a Redhead walk into a bar. They all buy a drink and talk about their days.

~Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was dead. ~ ~Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? ~ ~He was stapled to the monkey!!!

Two muffins are baking in an oven. The muffins do not talk or move, because they not living.

SCUBA is spelt S C U B A

What do you call a black man in an envelope? A tiny black man

1 pack of bacon 2 fat guys. They both die fighting over it.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie

A blonde walks into an electronics store to buy a toaster, the shopkeeper tells her that they do not serve blondes. She sues for discrimination and receives a considerable cash settlement while the shopkeeper looses his store and reluctantly works at a fast food franchise.

Roses are red, Violets are blue when I saw you what the heel are you

Roses are red violets are orange......... Wait did I do that wrong?

A pedophile walks into a daycare

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex afender

Coffee just isn't his cup of tea.

Ted Haggard.

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't because it had died from an uncaring mother and father that dumped it's corps on the side of the highway.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

Knock knock. Who's there. Alex. Alex who? Your brother Alex. Oh, please come in.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

you just contradicted yourself.

What dog keeps the best time? All dogs will keep reasonably good time as far as their care is concerned, if they have a stable home routine.

How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? 23

A baby seal walks into a club.... Oh....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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