Once upon a time There was an ugly barnacle He was so ugly That everyone died The end!

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A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

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What did the Jew say to the other Jew? Found a penny the other day....

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What happen to Teenage Mutain ninja turtals? Go Ninja Go.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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How do you scare Chris Ferguson? No one knows, he always has a pokerface on.

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What is the worst part of a 4 blacks hanging from a tree? They were only children

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What do you call a baby with no arms nor legs? An infant lacking limbs.

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Colby is gay.... thats it

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.... Take my wife..... .... She is lovely....

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How do you confuse a blond? Begin talking to her about a subject that's not in her field of expertise using complicated technical verbiage and jargon.

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What's 18 inches long and makes women scream all night? Cot death.

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Q: What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A: A pool table

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How does a cow does a cow do an evil laugh? Mooooooohahahahaha

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Why didn't Sally make it to school on time? She got savagely beaten and raped.

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What's funny about a man walking into a bar? He was a clown.

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What's worse than dying? Dying poor.

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How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? depends on how thin you can slice them.

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What happens when you yell at people who have high blood pressure? They might get heart attacks & die.

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Knock-knock. There is no reply. The burglar makes sure no one is home and breaks into a side window. After stealing some precious jewelry and family valuables, he exits through the same window.

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If i could rearrange the alphabet I wouldn't put U and I together. I'd put my dick in your mouth.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms Why did Susie drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere Knock Knock "Whos There?" Not Susie

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Justin bieber is a loser! One Direction all the way baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!<3

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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