- Anti Joke

Who am I? Your name is Harvey Jackson. Let's get you dressed so we can go downstairs for dinner. Nurse Holland will be helping you in a few moments.

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

Scene:restraunt Me:can I have a coke please? Waiter:sorry we don't have any, is Pepsi ok? Me:is monopoly money ok?

This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

Wade

Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made the man who said shut up mad so he told the man to shut up.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. My mom went to the doctor and found out she has cancer, so when she told me, I was eccentric. That tree is green.

new year new me my nigga's chilling on the couch . he'l be happy if i put my dlck inside his mouth next one: i got 4 but i give it to mr. gore when he say whats your name? me:hey my mane is Erick bryan and my puss* is wet wait nonono :D

Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

How do you kill a dinosaur with a spoon? You cant because they are extinct creatures

How much cocaine has Charlie Sheen done? enough to put your health at risk

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

Spotto

what do you call a man who makes fun of womens rights? Single

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? You eat a pizza.

What did the Groom give to his Bride on their honeymoon? Herpes.

Waseem is sad because all his jokes are not funny!

Why do people read Bibles? To learn about God.

Your mother is a stupid bitch. For real.

A walrus walks into a bar

A child walk's into a bar. And gets sexually abused.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it with an axe.

Roses are yellow Violets are also yellow Please don't stereotype again