Stop being a centipede

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it ain't gonna.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? What do you mean... we have been having a conversation for a half hour now... that's your name you idiot, Knock Knock!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a homicidal maniac.

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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Women.

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What did my Grandmother get for Christmas? Alzheimer's.

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This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

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What did the kind hearted wolf do when he saw the small, helpless, fluffy bunny? He ate it.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to 10 trees? 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

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What goes good with coca cola? Thirst

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Two Jews were fighting over a penny and then they realizde that they may be made fun of for this and quickly stopped.

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Anti-Joke Memes? That Shouldn't Be A Thing

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What does Santa get for Christmas? Chikungunya Fever.

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dead battery come on down

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One time i ate a hamberger than an hour later i sneezed but i dont think it had anything to do with the hamberger.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Republicans

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Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar and decide to have a drinking contest. Who won? The rabbi. The priest died of alcohol poisoning later that night.

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What is dangerous when eaten? My grandmother's cooking?

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The Cubs are going to win the world series this year

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What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a train

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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