What did the colonel say to the soldier before he got into the army tank? Get in.

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What's worse than falling on concrete? Being eaten by futuristic mutant trees in a volcano

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what do you call a man with no legs? disabled.

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Want to here a joke? Then get off this site!

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Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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why are asians eyes so slanted? because THEY WERE BORN THAT WAY!!!

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whats the difference between a joke and the holocaust? ...There both funny..Exept for the Holocaust.

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Guess what these words are: boo_s p_n_s _ _ ndom s_x fu_k wan_er Answers: books,pants,random,six,funk,wander.

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A Mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The black guy because the Mexicans was recently aressted for a dwi and had his repealed. But lately he has worked towards cleaning his life up. They were actually driving to an AA meeting.

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How much did the Holla Cost?

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whats worse than 9/11? 9/12

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A man walks into a bar. While he sits on a barstool, a man greets him politely, and they proceed with light conversation.

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a Black Swan walks into a bar......,,,.she then has hallucinations and imagines herself having lesbian sex with Mila Kunis...

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What did the milk say to the oatmeal? I came from a cow nipple.

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what is worst than finding a worm in your apple? finding half a worm in your apple

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So a black and mexican go to the foodstore to get foodstamps.the end

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Why was the white man rich and the black man poor? Because when the white man was 11 and he didn't have a job because 11 year olds don't get hired, because its not legal, he use to pick up pennies. And when the black man was 11 he got a job mowing lawns and ended up being a lawyer graduate and spent the rest of his life paying off his school loan. The white man lived in the 70's and the black man lived in he twentieth century.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Baby you think i loved you, but you got played too

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Jews

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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What just hit my face? The floor

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What does A duck smoke? Quack

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roses are red violets are blue i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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