whats red and and smells like blue paint red paint

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Why did the house stink? There were decomposing bodies under the floor boards.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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How do you starve a blonde? You tie them up and deprive them of any food.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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There were 4 black people in a Cadillac driving off a cliff. The sad thing was it was a nice car.

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A duck walked up to the lemonade stand And he said to the man running the stand: QUACK!

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Why did the farmer go to the market? Because his butt was on fire!

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What did the hammer say to the drill? Nothing, they don't talk stupid.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -Why? I don't know,I'm asking you the question.

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What's worse than the unwarrented death of six milliion Jews? The death of six million and one Jews

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A military serviceman returns home from a tour of duty to find his wife in bed with another man. He feels betrayed and files for divorce, then later meets a more faithful woman with whom he has a more fulfilling relationship.

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Why did the man name his boy "Sue?" He had bad eyesight and thought it was a girl.

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What do you call a fat guy falling down stairs Japan suffering.

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So what do you guys wanna do?? Anything, I still have cancer..

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Knock knock Who's there Santa who santa hates you and that is why you got nothing for Christmastime

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Gotta go Mark Gotta go Mark MARK MARKMARKMARK! Moving at the speed of mark I'm the quickest mark around Got ourselves a mark Start getting a new mark Without any mark On top of mark! Go- Go- Go- Don't mark Don't mark Just markmarkmarkmark! mark, he's on the run mark, he's number one mark, he's coming next so watch out for mark X! Gotta go mark, gotta go mark mark mark markmarkmark Go go go go go go go go go! marrrrrkkk X!!

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Pen15

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? It isn't doing anything, sir. It's dead.

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a child logs on to anti-joke.com and proceeds to post dead baby jokes and jokes with punchlines that suit the build up. i am bitterly disappointed as are all the other fans of anti-joke.com who understand the humor of anti jokes

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Knock Knock Who's There?? Its the police your family have died in a tragic road accident

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So a duck walks into a drugstore and asks the clerk for lip balm. The clerk asks, "How will you be paying for that?" to which the duck replies, "Cash."

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How do you stop a black guy from drowning? Take your foot off his head.

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what happens when I bought a car. A man stole it from me and killed my family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops