What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fish, just because it has a disability it doesn't mean you can treat it any differently

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What do you get when you mix a panda,oklahoma,and a handle? The oklahoma panhandle.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A nugget

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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yo mama's so fat her stomach mass weighs more than people who dont have as much fat as her.

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Why'd Katie fall off the swing? She had no arms

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version 2 knock knock, whose there FU CK FU CK who FU CK YOU

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Iggy Azalea

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She's dead.

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Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

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69

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What is more funny than an anti joke? A real joke.

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A man walked into a bar 2 hours later he died from drinking and driving

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What's good about freedom of speech? Only the idea. Try saying something about Muhammed or calling a cop a power-mad taxman.

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rose are red violets should be purple

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs? Chris

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(approach girl) How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to fit into the same dress as you

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? Doormat.

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How do you scare Chris Ferguson? No one knows, he always has a pokerface on.

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What do you call a baby with no arms nor legs? An infant lacking limbs.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? It was hit by an oncoming motorist in a busy intersection.

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How do you starve a blonde? You tie them up and deprive them of any food.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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