So what makes you that much adaptable? I get the feeling I should get this by now.

what did the crippled boy say to the truck driver? "i like cats."

Why do mexicans have so many children??? Because condoms resemble skinny balloons.

How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot of his head

you wanna know hellen kellers favorite game? Marco Polo!

Why did the old man have only one foot? Sadley, the other one was shot off in World War II and life hasnt been the same for him since.

Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

Why can't Bob go to the store? He's dead.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear made her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

What is worse then North Korea trying to blow up everybody? Peter Griffin twerking.

Knock knock who's there? Screw this Screw this who? Im screwing this like ur boyfriend screwed you!

A Muslim boards a plane and he sits done quietly and politely just like everyone else, the plan lands safely at its destination.

HEY YOU!!! just checking for assholes

Why does Deb wear a hat? Because she is actually bald.

Your mom is a whore bitchy virgin

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

You're mum is so fat, she has low self-esteem

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

What do you call a black man jumping off a bridge? Suicide.

so little jonny was doing bad in school like always so he decided to drop out and now he cant get a job and will have a terrible life and die alone

What I have learned about the Japanese studying video games and anime (read below for more, better studies): Student at school: USING PENN TO TYPU! USING PEN TO TYPU! Teacher: No Susaki San! You must onry yell the name of attakus! You suspension get! Student: JOSH! I CHARRENGE YOU TO MORTAR KOMBAT! Teacher: KAAAAAAAAMEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEE! Student: FINAL FRAAAAAAASH! Student and teacher: Locked into energy wave combat for several hours. Teacher: Puh... Lets rather settle this with a round of Shaolin Soccer... Student: VICTOLY! Me: Well I saw a disturbing lot of Japanese people cosplay dressed as zangief... Skinny guys with fake chesthair and red hair that kept posing with their (nonexistent) muscles and yelling RED CYCRONE! Wanting me to take pictures of them... And Japanese lolitas, and blonde girls called Ganguro... Weirdest trip ever... They also kept Looking at Emanuel my (black) friend, and assumed he was my servant... Conclusion: My real trip to Japan was not so different from my above example as one might think...

What did the young girl say to her step-dad? Nothing. She no longer talks to him after years and years of sexual abuse which left her emotionally scarred.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road, and then come back halfway? A: He was racing his friend to the other side. He didn't realize his friend got hit by a truck until he looked back. He continually cried until finally he got it together and walked over to his dead friend. He wasn't paying attention though, and another truck hit him. The truck driver continued his road trip and bought KFC for dinner.

how can you tell if your moms fat? if Dora can't explore her (mx)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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