Q: What do you get when you cross a rare breed of penguin with a horse. A: Well to be fair, turtles have shells

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like a someboyyyyyyyyyyyy

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poop is very very yummy.

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What do you call a pair of owls? Two owls.

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What is brown and sticky? Black tar heroin.

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Juggling lions and breast feeding.

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Why do people make antijokes? Because they can

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so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

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wood cant chuck wood

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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Why did the Mexican man jump to the floor? He had a stroke.

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What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

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what did the black man eat for dinner? a sandwich

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What did the innocent little girl get for Christmas? Lymphoma.

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

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Pickles

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Why is there a dead pakistani on my couch? Because someone put him there.

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The Pope

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gate open and chickens typically wonder with no obvious pattern to their movements.

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have you tasted chocolate flavoured slurpee? no. i haven't either

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Two Jews are on their way to the giant oven, one looks back at the other in fear and says, "I think I overcooked the lasagna."

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Two men walk into a bar... ..I didn't say what type of bar...

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Why did Eve eat the fruit first? Because women are whores.

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Whats hotter than the sun? Larger stars.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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