Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

a man walks into a bar and says "help me, my daughter just got hit by a car! the bartender phones the ambulance and the girl survives.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's better than four dead babies in one trashcan? Nothing. Those babies could have grown up to be new heads of state or even the doctor who discovers the cure for cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Three facts 1. You are reading this. 2. You realized that is a stupid fact. 3. You are leaving because this was a stupid joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call 100 black people at the bottom of the ocean? An unfortunate tragedy and astonishingly ironic curcumstance.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

knock knock who's there? boo don't do this joke again- i'll make you cry if you finish it don't cry it is just a knock knock joke teeheehee

thumb_up thumb_down +20

There was a man from the hood, His limericks weren't very good, So he decided to become a purveyor of monogrammed handkerchiefs and other fine linen products.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you say to jacks mum when your having Sex? Nothing she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Horton Hears... Rape and violence and doesn't do anything about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why does Polly want a cracker? Because meth is too intense.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are red. Violets are blue. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father, prepare to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

2 snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff.... ba dooom chesh

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

im gunna build a lego house what shud i make it out of

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and so are you, but the rose are wilted the violets are dead the sugar is lumpy and so is your head.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you do with dead chemists? You carefully place their remnants in a casket, which is to be placed in a precisely dug hole. Once the casket is placed, you put a gravestone into the ground, signifying the chemists' date of birth and death.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: Why did Katie fall of the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Katie

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q:How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could would A: 26

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Thanks

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a black man in an envelope? A tiny black man

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops