- Anti Joke

A lion walks into a barber shop and asks for a haircut and the barber says no then the lion proceeds to kill everyone in the shop

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, I Love The Music Only Jazz and Blues.

press a,s,d,f,g,h,j,k,l feel like a pianist

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating in a lake? Bob.

How does a plumber cross the street? Using his legs

Why'd the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was tied to the first one.

A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

Why did the chicken lay an egg? Because she got knocked up.

Person 1 : i need to sneeze Person 2 : ok ( person 1 sneezes ) Person 2 : bless u ( few seconds later ) did u sneeze? Person 1 : yep :)

Why did the chicken cross the road? Mind your own business.

What's black, white, has green stripes and smells like eggs? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

YOUR MOM HAS A DICK IN HER ASSCHEEKS!!!

What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

Whats blue and smells like red paint? If you know the answer then you should probably stop sniffing paint.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

And then i said what about breakfast at tiffanies, and then you said i hate that movie.

Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

Why did the little boy cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken

What's worse than hearing another Holocaust anti-joke? The Holocaust.

A black man boards a plane. He enjoys the rest of the flight in first class.

Pickup line: Hey do you like flowers? Because you stole my flowers.

why was the chinese man so good at math it was his favorite subject

Dogs in my home.