- Anti Joke

What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? There are certainly innumerable differences, but, in general, humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

Two nuns walk into a bar. There is a monkey between them, that they are both holding hands with. The bartender looks to them, and says "Hello sisters, I am sorry, but we do not allow wild animals into the bar. He's gonna have to wait outside," to which one of the nuns responds, "Oh, do not worry, this is no monkey, this is one of our sisters." The bartender is very confused. He chuckles, and says "Alright, well then your sister is going to have to wait outside." The sisters look at each other confusedly, but take the monkey outside, put it on a leash, and tie it to a pole. They proceed back inside, have a few drinks, and leave. The next night, the bar is a little more crowded. The bartender looks up and sees the two nuns entering. He checks to make sure there is no monkey with them, and there is not, so he goes back to serving drinks. A few minutes later, the two nuns are at the front of the bar ready to order drinks. The bartender smiles at them, "No monkey this time?" he asks. "Not tonight," says one of the nuns. "Alright," says the bartender, "what can I get you?" "I'll take a double bourbon," says one of the nuns. "I'll have a gin and tonic, and she'll have the same" says the other nun, motioning to a rhinoceros on her left. "What the fuck!!" yells the bartender. "How did you get this inside?! Where did you even get a rhinoceros?" He realizes these questions are unimportant, and runs to call animal control. By the time he turns around, however, the rhinoceros is gone. He goes to talk to the bouncer. "Dude, why do you keep letting in wild animals?" asks the bartender. "The hell are you talking about?" asks the bouncer. "Last night, two nuns walked in with a monkey, and tonight they somehow got a rhino past you. You didn't see that??" the bartender snaps. "Three nuns came in last night, and three came in tonight. No monkey, no rhino," the bouncer tells him. Meanwhile, as they walked home to the convent, one of the nuns says "Man, I haven't been drunk in weeks." One of the other nuns turns to her and says, "Well, maybe you should stop turning into an animal every time we get into a bar."

q

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

Jim: "Hey guess what" Bill: "What" Jim: "George Bush got reelected" Bill proceeds to throw himself into the Atlantic Ocean.

You're momma's so fat, Oh wait. She's not.

A man with a gun walks into a bar. The police are called and the man was killed quickly.

Your mother is so rotund, in fact she went to a weight loss clinic... but gained weight

what is the difference between babies and trampolines? you take your shoes off when jumping on a trampoline

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

Q: What is the meaning of life? A: We don't know. Dwight: FALSE. The answer to everything is 42.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocost

why are you people on anti-joke? BECAUSE you have NO LIFE !

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 3

Why did the man have an erection? He had just masturbated.

Knock Knock! Who's there? Joe Joe who? Your friend Joe OK come in

Two tubes of ice cream are sitting in a freezer, one turns to the other and says "its bloody freezing in here" God then corrects this apparent mistake in the combined laws of physics and biology

i have a white dog on my and have the strangest boner

A black man went on the bus and sat down next to a white man. The white man looked up from his magazine and stared at the black man. They then chit-chatted and enjoyed their trip.

Dislike this

Why did Billy drop his ice cream?? He got hit by a truck.

what do you call anybody eating at mcdohnalds? hungry, diabetic people

Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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