Two drums and a cymbol fall off a cliff... ba bum BUM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA it used to be ba dum ching but im so funny that i changed it to ba dum bum. credit to Alex H

Why did the gecko cross the road.... Because he saw great deals on car insurance!!!

How do you get straight A's? Try really hard throughout the school year and when it comes to the exams study enough to ensure you understand all the material, but so so much as to compromise your sleeping pattern, and in turn, your performance on the day.

What's black and white and red all over? A nun in a blender.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, racist.

Bill is at a bar with a couple of his college buddies. He notices another one of his friends, Jim, who has his back faced to him, and calls him. The man turns and it is not Jim. Bill apologizes and they carry on with their lives.

What did the 4 year old black kid ask his father for Christmas? A yo-yo. nah im just kidding he doesnt know who his father is.

How do you know your sister is on her period? - Your dad´s dick tastes like blood.

why did little suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock: Who's there? Not little suzy Why did the car crash? Little suzy was driving Why didn't little suzy ride her bike home? She died of her injuries from the car crash

roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. His death was mourned by his wife and three children who wished he would not have been so reckless.

What did the boy do when he was bored and broke? He took to the streets selling illicit drugs such as cocaine. Although dangerous, the rush from said danger solved his boredom problem. On top of this, there is a huge market for such substances and he was not broke for much longer.

*Ring* *Ring* Bartender : Hello? Stranger:Is Mike Hunt their? Bartender: Mike Hunt! Is Mike Hunt here?! Mike Hunt: Oh thank god! I've been anticipating this phone call for a while now! I've been stranded here for hours and my wife's been killed and the killer is still out there!

why'd the women leave the kitchen? her chain broke

BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

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What's worse than a stain on your carpet? Two stains on your carpet

what do you call 10 mexicans standing in a line? It's probably a lunch line for a taco vendor. And even this is just a coincidence. Everybody loves tacos.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear made her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

What is Kanye West's main goal in life? To crush the hopes and dreams of singing stars on national television, beginning with Taylor Swift.

Ay Bee Cee Dee Ey Ef Gee Haych Eye Jay Kay El Em En Ow Pee Queue Our Es Tee You Vee Doubleyou Ex Why Zed Now you know your ABC, come along and sing with me!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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