What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

A white man, a black man, and a mexican were stranded in a giant dessert, They were quick to notice the spelling error and ate happily for a few days

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jewish people aren't edible.

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Nothing it is a sentient object and doesn't have the capability to talk

What did Michael Jackson get for Christmas? Nothing he's dead

An asian without a future.

Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

Why did the depressed teenager die? Because he had cancer.

Why did Harry Potter cast a spell on Chuck Norris' penis? Never mind.

Why do black people like Basketball so much? Because it is a sport participated world wide. They just happen to like it too.

How did the bald lady die? Of cancer

When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

feces

Whats the difference between Lady Gaga and a man? Nothing. I was lying about their being a difference.

knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

A: B: No pun intended.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did Little Timmy fall off of his bike? Because he was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator. Knock knock Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

Roses are red, Muslims are brown, When I see them swimming, I hope that they drown!

What would be worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts.

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he, he's blind.

Why didn't the boy run the marathon? He was cripple.

What did the Bishop say to the pebble? Wash my car

Who did the Vampire bite? No one because vampires aren't real.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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