What do you call the alarm system in a failing inner-city school? A dumbbell!

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How do you get a one armed man to fall out of a tree? Wave.

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lyren is a big meanyhead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm asking, really... ..come on, someone has to know...

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What do you call Eric Torres A furnace magnet

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What is the answer to the question of Life, the Universe and Everything? That doesn't make any sense.

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Me: f*** off Asshole: YOUR MOM! Me: -is dead.

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what do u call a long dik gay guy Gay Dickerson

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What did the cat say to the elephant? Meow.

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What's worse then finding a repeated joke on antijokes? Finding a real joke.

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A very unskillful basketball team enters a basketball tournament. They had little chance of winning and concluded with a loss.

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What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

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a man walked into a bar "ouch"

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Roses are red,nuts are brown,skirts go up,pants go down,body to body, skin to skin, when its stiff, stick it in,the longer its in, the stronger it gets,it goes in dry, comes out wet, its comes out dripping and starts to sag Its not what you think its a...Teabag

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That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

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What do you call a black kid with dead parents? Depressed

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Which one is hardest?

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An boy with ADHD walks into a

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "How's it going?" The man replies, "Bless you." The man walks out of the bar, as his peers realize he was honest when he told them a week earlier that he had autism.

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this sentence will not monkey banana pie

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A girl was walking home from school, she had a pizza box in her hands, her mom was waiting for her in the car to take her to T.G.I.F, and then she dropped the pizza box in the middle of the street. In a frantic attemp to get the box, she run out into the middle of the street and got hit by a semi. Her funeral is tomorrow.

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what happened to the boy who crossed the street. he got shot by a bus

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 babies? The Ferrari is expensive and the babies are in a nice hospital.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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