q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

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who likes it up the anus? jason frisone at saybrook ave 08094 williamstown new jersey thats who

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

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A: Knock Knock! B: Come in!

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Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

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Why cant little billy jump? He was aborted.

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Why did the man stand on one foot? Because he had one leg.

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Oh my God, my friend just got hit by a truck. Lets go get ice cream

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Think about it: Is mexico REALLY full of: Lowrides in candy ass sparkly colors such as lip red that bounce, (manly color right? Yeah sure baggot) which contains a whole street war gang of members inside and at least twenty tons of COCAINA! ...But does not have a horn that plays "la cucaracha" Seriously, you say yes right? Hey look at this guy he said yes everybody, but ITS WROOOOOOONG CUCARACHA OR GTFO OF MEXICO! Yeah... Because Mexico is shit, id would be racist if Mexicans didn't agree...

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Q: What's the difference between Bigfoot and an intelligent blonde? A: Whereas intelligent blondes are known to exist, most scientists discount the existence of Bigfoot and consider it to be a combination of folklore, misidentification, and hoax, rather than a living animal, in part because of the large numbers thought necessary to maintain a breeding population.

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so there are two muffins. no wait there are three muffins in an oven. actually it was a toaster oven. and they were covered in butter. uuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhh cheese on toast anyone?

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Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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What is a man with no arms and no legs on a pile of leaves? A quadriplegic who enjoys the fall.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had escaped from a KFC slaughterhouse, and proceeded forward to avoid getting caught. However, the chicken did not consider the childhood lectures off his parents about crossing the road safely, and got ran over by a black Golf GTI, and died instantly.

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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how do you get a baby to stop swinging from a fan whack it with a shovel

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Q: What do you call an American who has both Irish and Italian ancestry? A: An American.

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What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shih-tzu? Dogs are large and solid objects and therefore cannot be mixed together.

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Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: 9/11 jumpers 200 stories in 5 seconds

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After the haitian revolution, Haiti lived happily ever after, Until god smited them with a devastating natural disaster

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guys ive got a TANK under my house a septic tank

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What do you call 12 black doctors in a dark room? 12 black doctors in a dark room.

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Q: How many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 6 million and 1

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops