Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

Think about it: Is mexico REALLY full of: Lowrides in candy ass sparkly colors such as lip red that bounce, (manly color right? Yeah sure baggot) which contains a whole street war gang of members inside and at least twenty tons of COCAINA! ...But does not have a horn that plays "la cucaracha" Seriously, you say yes right? Hey look at this guy he said yes everybody, but ITS WROOOOOOONG CUCARACHA OR GTFO OF MEXICO! Yeah... Because Mexico is shit, id would be racist if Mexicans didn't agree...

What is a man with no arms and no legs on a pile of leaves? A quadriplegic who enjoys the fall.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

Why cant little billy jump? He was aborted.

What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? Drowning.

q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

guys ive got a TANK under my house a septic tank

After the haitian revolution, Haiti lived happily ever after, Until god smited them with a devastating natural disaster

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

how do you get a baby to stop swinging from a fan whack it with a shovel

What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shih-tzu? Dogs are large and solid objects and therefore cannot be mixed together.

Q: How many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 6 million and 1

What do you call shark with no dorsal fin? Unused ingredients for soup.

Q: What do you call a hobo asking for change? A: Get off my driveway!

What did the man do when he saw there was water spilled on his desk? He waited two hours for it to evaporate because he was too lazy to wipe it up.

timmy: a duck walks up to a lemon stand and says to the man running the stand hey... Paul: what r u talking about its duck it can't talk

What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

whats worse than 10 dead babies in my garage? 11 dead babies in my garage

When life hands you lemons... do not squeeze them, for juice may squirt into your eye, causing severe pain.

How did the mermaid break her arm? She fell out of a tree.

Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

what is the difference between babies and trampolines? you take your shoes off when jumping on a trampoline

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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