roses are red facebook is blue no mutual friends who the heck are you

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What do you call a man who laughed at a joke that wasn't funny? A man who gets amused at the littlest things.

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Oh my God! A talking dog!

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What do you call a black man at the front of a bus? A bus driver

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Why did the litle boy's hat come off? cause he got hit by a train!

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We didnt star the fire ...........

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What looks like half an apple? The other half.

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Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? It isn't doing anything, sir. It's dead.

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Why was the pilot suspended from flight? He was the terrorist who caused 911. OUCHH

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What sounds really bad? An accordion.

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What noise does a dead dog make ? Nothing its dead

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version 2 knock knock, whose there FU CK FU CK who FU CK YOU

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What did the german get for christmas? an Easy-Bake oven and a G.I. Jew

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Multiple Personalities So do I Me to Don't forget about me!

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How are you? Yes

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Why did jimmy fall of his bike? Because jimmy was a goldfish

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

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Knock knock Whoes there? ...

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whats harder than watching a dog get hit by a bus? my boner..

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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There are two types of people in the world: humans

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Sarah Palin, George Bush Jr and Glenn Beck are having a massive orgy with an illegal mexican immigrant, a member of the NAACP and an empathetic selfless homosexual democrat...no condoms were used because only felatio and cunilingus was being performed...

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what has 2 eyes but can't see... an asian

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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