Whats gayer than driving a prius Buttsex

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Your mom is such a slut she had sex with your dad on the very first night of their marriage!

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Waseem is sad because all his jokes are not funny!

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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Yo mamma is so nice, when she bakes a batch of cookies, there's enough for everybody.

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Why was the baby smoking? He was locked in a hot car.

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Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? People cross roads all the time, each for their own personal reasons. Questioning their motives is generally accepted as being unnecessary, as it is a relatively safe action as log as one is careful and heeds the laws of traffic.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs floating in the water? Nothing, because he would drown from his absence of limbs.

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What does a dog do in his spare time? Lick himself.

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A priest, a midget, and the toothfairy walk into a bar. Barack Obama.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? Politely ask him to come down

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What did the cowboy say to the skunk? You smell.

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There's was an old lady. She fell in a puddle

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What happens when you mix Fluorine, Uranium, Carbon, and Potassium? NaBrO

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Roses are angry Violets are too My head is scratchy I need shampoo

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Knock knock Who's there? A ghost A ghost who?

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Why did the bartender cry when a construction worker ordered a Jack and Coke? His son Jack had run away five years ago to sell cocaine; his father hadn't seen him since.

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(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

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Three surfers paddle out into the surf. They had a pretty good time, except one of them got a shit ton of water up his nose.

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Why is the fat kid laying on the ground crying? Because I hit him with a shovel

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you dirty racist.

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What is the difference between a doorknob? Toast.

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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