Q. Why was the dad sad? A.His favorite team lost in the championship.

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Why can't Hank drive? Hank is a stone.

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p p p penis. penis's are big and juicy

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What do you get after putting bread in a toaster? -Toast.

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Your best friend is different from a dead person. The best friend will die if you shoot him in the head but the dead person won't die, he's already dead.

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Yo mama's so fat that she takes too muc oh fuck it I'm stuffed Henri and Chaz

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Call or text this number and say whatever 863-670-1547 or you can mail things to his house 252 village crest court lakeland florida 33809

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What starts with 's' and ends in 'ex'? S.e.x -XH

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What's worse than a needle in a hay stack? A needle in a stack of drug addicts.

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A man walked into a bar. He ended up in the hospital being treated for a concussion.

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Jennifer Kim is the nicest person I have ever met, everyone loves her.

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Hey

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts. What's invisible and smells like rabbit farts? Carrots, if you're blind.

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hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Thats impossible because he cannot walk.

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69

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So there was this Afghan with a backpack on a train... he was going to work.

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Bloody kids ...

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why was your family so sad? because you died due to your uncle's son's cousin urinating all over you as a baby causing you to sting yourself continually. did i mention you were born as a scorpion while your family members were all human beings making them neglect and throw you away in their trash when you would always climb out. your family secretly hid affection for you. back to the beginning. when you died everyone in the whole world except bill cosby got cancer at the exact moment you died, but years later (because bill cosby is immortal), he got down syndrome after everyone who was alive during your death died. that is why he goes doo dop bip babbity today.

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What did the homeless man get for his birthday. Nothing. Get it: He lived a life along with a giant family and on christmas eve 2012 he broke his kneecap and was in the E.R. He got out of the hospital on christmas only to come home to find a burning house; his house. Every member in his family died except for him as they were all in the house when it caught on fire. The house completely burnt and crumbled, and that is why he is homeless.

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How do you get three Canadians out of a pool? Say "Hey guys time to get out of the pool."

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Why didn't the skeleton go to th party? Because he was dead.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? So. So who? Cares.

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-What do you call the brown spots in your yard? Dog shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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