haha, you're an orphan

this sentence will not monkey banana pie

Why was the little boy so bad at the piano? It was his first time playing it.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She got shot.

Doorbell salesman.

Why does no one we talk about Nagasaki, they got bombed too...

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has two penises

two black guys are in a car. Whose driving? The question is too broad. Either one of those men or unmentioned people could be driving the car.

Your mama is so fat, her gravitational field varies with distance cubed!

Watch your lips.

If shoes could talk they'd tell you that they are not willing support your weight & floors are extremely dirty.

Why did the old man order the little girl into the car? Because he was her grandfather.

"Why did the chicken cross the-" "Gosh! Why can't we just live in a world where a chicken can simply cross the road without being questioned about it's motives?!?!" ~McKenna<3

Penis

Why did the blonde kill herself? She was diagnosed with major depression and was dealing with a lot of traumatic events in her life.

How do you feed a mockingbird? Give it some food.

What did the black man say to the policeman? "Take it easy."

a car drives off a cliff whos driving? an asin woman!

Parents: What do you want for your birthday? Boy: A yellow ping pong ball. 7th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball 13th birthday P: What would you like for you birthday son? B:A yellow ping pong ball. P:Hmm, fine. 17th birthday P: What would you like for your birthday son? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: That's is I'm getting you a car! Day before 18th the boy drives into a bridge. He lies in his hospital bed and his parents are there. P: What would you like for you birthday tomorrow? B: A yellow ping pong ball. P: Fine. Why do you want these ping pong balls anyway? B: Because. And then he died.

How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Barrack Obama shops at Baby Gap

WHATS BALCK AND YELLOW AND UNDER WATER? A BUMBLE BEE IN A SUBMARINE.... YEAH YOU BETTER #$%^ING LAUGH YOU HOMO

what did the turkey say on thanks giving? Nothing, he's dead, we ate him!

Whats worse than blue balls? Green Balls.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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