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So a magician was driving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

What do you get when you have sex with a $10 prostitute? Nothing, she's clean. She may be low-scale, but she'll be damned if she's not careful.

What happens when you put a bunch of Republicans in a room together? They form a caucus.

42

Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese

What do you call a toddler with a gun? Interesting

What did the blonde do when she missed bus 40? She waited 30 minutes for it to come back around again.

How do you keep someone in suspense? I'll tell you tomorrow.

A turkey and a ham walk into a room. The ham says to the turkey "You're a turkey." The turkey in response says, "Yeah, well you're a ham!" They both then get their heads chopped off, as the room they were in was a slaughterhouse.

What did one homo say to the other? Well, the politically correct term is homosexual, and he didn't say anything because they've never met.

What has wheels and flies? An Airplane

What did little Jimmy say when he saw a group of dancing blue penguins dressed as cannibal clowns with saucers on their head ? "What the f*ck"

Justin Beiber

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

Why did the Jewish boy grab his groin? Because he was just circumcised.

Would you like a better house, car, spouse, and a better life all together? No, no thanks.

Roses are Violets, Violets are Roses, I am a dumb ass, The Hobbit.

My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

Knock knock Who's there? Johnny Johnny who? Names don't matter. Now shut up and let me in before I kill your family

A black guy and Hispanic guy jump off the Empire State Building at the EXACT same time. Who dies first? Who cares?!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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