What is the way to a woman's heart? Through her chest cavity.

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Fire extinguishers are sexy.

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...NO.

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Do you know what will hurt? Getting hurt.

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three men get stranded on a island and cannibals find them and they say go find 3 fruits and come back. first guy comes back with three apples and they say we will shuve them in your rectum and if you scream we will kill you he screams he dies. second guy comes back with grapes and he laughs before they can start. and in heaven the first guy says why did you laugh and he says there voices are funny.

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What do giant panda bears eat? giant bamboo

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I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

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Three males walked into a bar. one of them was a kangaroo.

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A chinese man walks into a bar, and he see's his friends they are black, mexican, white, and paki. This is their meeting place for their group on racial equality.

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Both my milk chocolate and my white chocolate are brown. Why? I crapped on my white chocolate.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "Only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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this website is the funniest thing i've ever seen, besides everything i've seen that's funnier than it

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why was the boy mad at school? something probably upset him.

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- Mom, you've got a banana in your ear. - Son I can't hear you I've got a banana in my ear!

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What is big, red, and beats rocks? A big, red, rock beater.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the World Chicken Road Crossing Competition.

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What percentage of her brain does Sarah Palin use? 100%. That humans use only 10 or 30% of their brains is a myth.

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P1 : Yo mamma's so fat... P2: My moms dead

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What's a black man's favorite food? It depends.

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Why does Snoop Dogg need an umbrella? Fo' Drizzle

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Q: What do you call a women with 2 bowling pins? A: A women with 2 bowling pins.

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What do you call a black person with food stamps? A freeloader.

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Who graduated top of their class, got their degree two years early and lead a very successful life? Not you

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Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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