Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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Bob: What's gucci bro Tim: Is that a company?

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Why do Christians believe in God? They made him up

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Ham and Cheese!

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Black guy? A pizza can serve a family of four.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Cassidy's a whore so open the door.

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What has two thumbs and is very pale? A dead baby.

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Chuck Norris doesn't answer the phone - he doesn't have one at the moment

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? He was on his way home from work and saw some youths loitering on the street corner and thought it best to avoid them and therefore any possible confrontation. He would also appreciate it if you would call him something along the lines of Bravery impaired instead of a chicken as he finds it offensive and doesn't fully understand the avian reference to his lack of confidence.

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what does a gorilla do when it sleeps. it snores.

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Friends are like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe. N

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A black man hailed a taxi cab. He got in, and the taxi drove him to his destination for an appropriate fee.

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Why didn't the firefighter put out the fire? Because he wasn't a very good firefighter.

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Q) what's black and white and red all over? A) a slaughtered zebra.

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"Hello?" "Is your refrigerator running??" "Yes..." "Oh. Well then have a nice day."

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What's worse than being punched in the face? Being lynched.

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What did the pig say after having sex? "Oink".

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One day i had to piss. I went to the bathroom.

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You wanna hear a funny joke? Sorry, but I'm really not a funny guy. Not a comedian, you know.

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Ask me if I'm a human! - Are you a human? No. The correct term would be a human being.

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What became of the girl who drank shellac and died? Her poor father attempted CPR for three hours straight before being forced to give up on his child's life. A massive funeral was held; everyone she ever knew attended. It was a very sad affair.

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What do you call a black man digging a hole in the ground with a body covered in blood, bruises and stab marks next to him? An gardener, he uses a different type of fertiliser.

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Your mother is so ugly that people make yo mamma jokes about her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops