Q: What did one raccoon say to the other? A: We do not know, as raccoons do not speak any human language. And no human being can understand or communicate with one.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's an Animal? A natural periodic state of rest for the mind and body, in which the eyes usually close and consciousness is completely or partially lost, so that there is a decrease in bodily movement and responsiveness to external stimuli. During sleep the brain in humans and other mammals undergoes a characteristic cycle of brain-wave activity that includes intervals of dreaming. ... are you retarded? yes how did you know?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between Skittles and black people? ...I like Skittles.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

thumb_up thumb_down -153

A black man enters a bar. The bartender approaches him, and asks "who will it be?" The black man pulls out a gun and robs the bar, he is then arrested ten days later.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

I black guy was walking down a street when he saw a beautiful women and said to her that she looked lovely

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gang-rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -82

A Weight loss service that works

thumb_up thumb_down -96

Your friend is so gay that he came out of the closet and was accepted warmly by his friends and family for who he is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +81

How did Eric Clapton's son fall to his death? He crawled out the window.

thumb_up thumb_down +69

Anything Dane Cook says

thumb_up thumb_down +43

why didn't the food in your microwave warm up ? because you didn't press start.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You poke-her-face

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? The colour of their skin.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is worse than finding 4 worms in your apple 3 holocausts the 4th worm would be dead after 3 holocausts

thumb_up thumb_down -23

a Squirrl climded a tree to get a nut

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What's red, yellow, and full of diabetes? Mcdonalds

thumb_up thumb_down +162

Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers

thumb_up thumb_down +94

Why did the chicken cross the road ? Possibly because it saw some sort of reason to do so, and being a chicken. Doesn't see the danger in motor vehicles.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Don't look! I'm naked! No, seriously! I'm naked!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the brick say to the face? Nothing bricks don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

whats sixty-twelve and a half + one one sixty-twelve isn't a number

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops