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How do you make a clown sad? Throw a brick at him.

Most of men think: the bigger dick they have, the more pleasure they can give to woman. Most of women don't thinks so, becouse they haven't got a dick.

what did the guy who had unsafe sex get? A good time

What's the difference between Skittles and black people? ...I like Skittles.

Q: What did one raccoon say to the other? A: We do not know, as raccoons do not speak any human language. And no human being can understand or communicate with one.

A blond, a brunette and a redhead jump off a cliff. Which one hits the ground last? Depends on their weight and drag co-efficient.

What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

What do you get if you cross a black man with a knife? Stabbed.

"An alcohol walks into a man. He is a family and is destroying the bar." Says the drunk man to the bartender who wrote it on Anti-joke.com.

A man decides to commit suicide and jumps from the highest building in New York, he dies instantly on impact... the day was septermber 11th 2001, either way it was the end for the man

Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers

What kind of cat has no tail? Manx cat

Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Knock Knock Whos there? Me Me who? Oh sorry forgot you had alzheimers :/

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

Why don't women like to have penises? Evidently women have different tastes than men in what body parts they enjoy having.

Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

A man heard a thundering sound. It was thunder.

adam shagged katie lololol

What's green and if it fell from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

"Nice pair of crocs" said nobody

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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