A horse walks into a bar and orders a scotch on the rocks. Realizing how strange this occurrence was, the bartender immediately calls the local news station and tells them there is a talking horse in his place of business and it would be in their best interest to come do a story on it, because the likelihood of them finding another story of this magnitude is quite slim.

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why are black peroples noses so big ? because thats where God held them when he spray painted them

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Excuse me sir, you wouldn't happen to have the time, would you?

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How do you call the smallest mouse on Earth? James.

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Why did the Chinese man cross the road? To get to the Chinese restaurant.

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why didnt anyone like matt adams? cuz hes a stupid buttface

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Q: how many people with adhd does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: wanna go ride bikes?

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A labrador, a chihuahua, and a great dane walk onto a bar. They are strays and were brought to the pound where they were more than likely put down or adopted.

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What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

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What's green and if it fell from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for christmas? a pair of shoes and gloves

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A Man walks into a bar, he sits down on a stool and begins to cry. Why are you crying, asks the Bartender. I just lost my job, my wife left me and I had my car reposesed. Ok says the Bartender, I know what'll cheer you up, he promptly pulls out a 12 inch piano and begins to play. The Man at the Bar says, hey thats awesome where did you get it? The Bartender says, a really old Genie gave it to me. You know what, I like you so I am going to let you have my last wish. Really? Asks the man, Ok thanks, I wish for a million bucks said the man at the bar. There was a Loud voice saying "Your Wish has been granted" then the room was full of ducks. Hey! Exclaimed the man, I didn't wish for a million ducks, I wished for a million bucks! Yeah, said the bartender, and I wished for a 12 inch penis...

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what did the guy who had unsafe sex get? A good time

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

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Knock knock. I HAVE A SHOTGUN

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What do you call a mexican riding a bike? A cyclist.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman were stuck on a desert island, because they were touring investment property islands off the coast of Dubai and their boat had engine trouble. They were eventually picked up in a helicopter.

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- What's green and invisible? *holds out empty hand* - This cabbage

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what kind of animals marriage is high? snails because It has home and car.

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Okay, then I am taking the last comment back then.

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i just want thumbs up so i feel better about myself.....

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What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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