Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

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What did santa claus say when he saw a girl standing on the corner? Ho Ho Ho... ;)

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what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. :D

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what do you get when you get when you cross a chicken and a mad scientists a mutant chicken

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So, North Korea is getting ready to nuke the US... BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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how do you make money? you roba bank! :)

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Why couldn't the blonde drive? Because she was 14, thus incapable of having a drivers license

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There was a peice of lasagna. He knew he tasted great. So he constantly feared for his life.

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What is invisible and smells like bananas? Monkey Farts.

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I like my women like I like my coffee Without a penis

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Why did the man throw his watch out the window? Because it was broken.

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What's the diffrents beetween a carrot and a dead baby? One I like to eat in my soup, the other one s a carrot.

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Type 2 diabetics

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Penis-Pump

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how much is a microwave full of dead babies? a fridge full of dead puppies.

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25

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there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

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what do you call a kid without arms and legs? names

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A boy asks his teacher to go to the bathroom, she says ok but only if he can sya the alphabet. He says ok, but for some reason skips the letter P. How come? -Because he has a sever learning disability and is having a hard time remebering all the letters of the alphabet

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What do you call a black man? Jamal

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- Why a black man can not jump? - Because he broken his leg.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops