Shit Happens....or sometimes it doesn't! As the person is taken to the hospital with severe constipation.

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What do you call a special Ed walrus? Anorexic pony ???? Discovering that a convicted sex offenderi is living nearby stirs up a range of feelings: fear, anger, insecurity and anxiety. There are many things you can do to make the situation more manageable - and channel these emotions into actions that address situations that put children most at risk for sexual harm. Learn how to identify the most common threats and concerns. Then find out the best ways you can join with others to keep everyone safe. Take action! Learn how to keep children safe Get the FAQs about the sex offender registryi Download our Tip Sheet:  Concerned about Sex Offenders in Your Neighborhood?

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whydid the little boy drown? he can't swim

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Knock knock Get off my porch.

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When life gives you lemons make lemonade, when life gives you apples make apple juice, when life gives you cranberries make cranberrie juice and then when live gives you mangos, Eat them :)

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What's Donald Trump's favorite color?

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I'll be back. Please use the door.

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What do you call a room with a black person, a mexican, a jew, and a homosexual A diverse area

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how did the thirteen year old girl get pregnant? she was raped.

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Ken wins!

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 452

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Why did Janelle fail her math test? Because she didn't study.

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"We have such clean water we drink and do a lot of other stuff with it" The American said. "What other stuff do you do with your clean water" The African Child said. "Well we take showers in and we go to bathroom with it" The American said. "So let me get this straight you even take a Shit in it to" The African Child said.

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NASCAR

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: why the long face? he has cancer

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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Q: Why did the plain crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. By: LV

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Patient: Doctor Doctor! Doctor: Yes. Patient: I think I'm a moth! Doctor: You don't need a doctor, you need Mental help. Patient: Yes I know. Doctor: Then why are you here? Patient: The light was on.

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. pussy . I don't get it ? .of course you don't

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Knock! Knock! Whose there? Chris Chris who? (There was never a response. Leaving the man to wonder who Chris was... Was it his high school buddy Chris? His former colleague? That guy who filled his propane tank down at the gas station? Was that guy's name even Chris-or was it Craig? Craig, it was definitely Craig.)

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How do you confuse Hellen Keller? Put her in a circular room and tell her to find the corner.

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How do you make a burns victim cry? You show them a mirror.

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Q: Why don't gingers have souls? A:Ginger is a root that consumed whole as a delicacy, medicine, or spice. Why would it have a soul?

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Why did the kid stop going to school? His alarm clock broke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops